parenting – RootedInAbundance

How Your Morning Routine Controls Your Life

June 10, 2021crunchy mom, Lifestyle, Natural Motherhood2 Comments

We all have different ways of starting our day – some of us try to have a very intentional routine while others linger in bed scrolling, and most of us have experienced both. Starting our day with intention has a monumental impact on our productivity, mood, and overall well-being.

I’m sure it comes as no surprise, but the way you start your day is the way your day will go. Our perspective determines how we feel about the day and if we start the day with a feeling of “I’m exhausted and don’t want to do anything” it will surely linger throughout the day slowing us down and making our daily tasks feel like an annoyance. While on the other hand, if we start our day with gratitude and the intention of being happy, our day is much more likely to be full of positivity.

This post may contain affiliate links. As an affiliate, I may receive a small stipend for any purchases made on links with no additional cost to you.

Benefits of A Morning Routine

Creating a morning routine can impact our mood, our productivity, our creativity, and our overall mental health. Not only does the routine itself help relieve stress because you don’t need to make choices each morning and you know what to expect, but the intentional time each morning can have monumental effects on our well being and personal growth.

Researchers have found that routine can have far-reaching psychological benefits, including alleviating bipolar disorder, ADHD, and insomnia.
Headspace

Tips For An Effective Morning Routine

What your morning routine consists of will alter its effectiveness. These practices will allow your routine to improve your mental health, overall wellness, and personal growth.

Schedule your day research on morning routines

Practice Gratitude

Gratitude has been defined as an emotion or state resulting from awareness and appreciation of that which is valuable and meaningful to oneself.
Psychology Today

When you’re focused on the good, it’s a lot harder to be upset when things don’t go the way you hoped. Practicing gratitude can bring us joy by seeing all that is good in our lives.

Gratitude can change your brain and overall emotional state. When you wake up each day and think about what is good in your life, you shift your selective attention. You train your mind to focus on the positive.
Psychology Today

If you don’t know where to start or feel silly you can start really simple by just making a list each morning of 5 things you are grateful for. I am grateful for my cozy home, I am grateful for warm coffee, I am grateful for the birds singing outside, I am grateful for nutritious food, and I am grateful for the opportunity to reflect on life. You can also try guided gratitude journals or gratitude cards. Do your best to really feel the gratitude and joy with each statement. The more you do it, the easier it will get!

Meditate

Meditation is a practice used to train your brain to control your thoughts and focus (usually on your breath). It is often defined as a tool to heighten your state of awareness. Meditation is great way to start your day refreshed and gain control of your thoughts and intentions.

One study found that 8 weeks of mindfulness meditation helped reduce anxiety symptoms in people with generalized anxiety disorder, along with increasing positive self-statements and improving stress reactivity and coping
Healthline

There are endless guided meditations you can try. One of my favorites is Breathe People (not an affiliate). These meditations are very helpful for releasing stress, tension, and creating a sense of calm. You can also try just sitting and focusing on your breath. Breathe in. Breathe out.

For more information and guidance on meditation I recommend Practicing Mindfulness and Quick Calm.

Journal

Journaling is the act of writing in a journal– you can write about your feelings, about a memory, about your day, or about your hopes and dreams.

Research has shown that expressing your thoughts and emotions in your journal can enhance your emotional intelligence.
Psychology Today

When we write about our hopes and dreams, it can actually help those dreams happen. You can create a mental rehearsal by writing your dream: a practice of feeling and planning what your dreams will look like and how they will make you feel when they happen.

According to research on mental rehearsal, once we immerse ourselves in that scene, changes begin to take place in our brain. When we are feeling the emotions of our future — whether that’s gratitude, joy, freedom, abundance, enthusiasm, love, and so on — the creative thoughts in your mind can become the experience. As the body receives the chemical signals of these emotions, essentially the body is receiving the signal that the event has already occurred.
— Dr. Joe Dispenza

Plan & Set Intentions

Plan your day! Create a schedule, decide how you’ll feel for the day, and set intentions. Planning and setting intentions can happen while journaling, you can write to do lists, you can choose some affirmations for the day, and organize your thoughts and schedule.

For example, if you are wanting to eat healthier, set the intention that you will nourish your body with healthy foods and plan ahead by preparing healthy meals and snacks.

Do you have a morning routine? What are your favorite parts? What do you want to add to your morning routine?

As I’ve gotten older, time feels like an increasingly rare commodity, so I try to be more mindful of how I use it.
Liz Fooslien

C-Sections: What You Need To Know and Why To Refuse Unnecessary C-Sections

March 27, 2020Birth, Natural Motherhood7 Comments

What Research Says About C-Sections and How To Mitigate Negative Effects

C-Sections are a revolutionary medical procedure that have saved many women’s and babies’ lives. C-Sections are an important emergency tool, however, C-Sections should only be used as a life saving tool and not regularly used by physicians as a way to control birth or as an alternative to vaginal birth.

“Nearly a third of childbirths in America happened by cesarean section in 2017, but whether a woman has a C-section may have more to do with where she gives birth than her health or that of her baby.”
https://www.usnews.com/news/healthiest-communities/slideshows/c-section-rates-are-highest-in-these-states

Although some may feel C-Sections are a better choice because they are more controlled than vaginal birth, C-Sections can have a myriad of consequences for both mom and baby.

Not only can more medical issues occur for mom such as hemorrhage, infection, and blood clots, C-Sections can also have a lasting impact on baby’s health and development.

“Research had shown various associations between cesarean delivery and long-term health problems, including higher rates of obesity and asthma in children.”
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/09/23/well/family/autism-c-section.html

Despite the research showing the negative impact on both moms and babies, C-Section rates remain high. Some doctors continue to push mothers to schedule a C-section merely because they are near their due date or because it is more convenient.

“Rates of cesarean deliveries have increased despite warnings from WHO that it should only be used in life-threatening cases due to risk of complications.”
https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/cesarean-section-complication-risk-rises-mother-s-age-study-finds-n993611

It’s important as mothers that we are aware and educated about the possible effects of a C-section so we can make an educated decision when a doctor suggests a c-section, whether it be continuing with a C-section, getting a second opinion, or changing doctors.

Risks For Baby

“Studies have reported negative health outcomes in offspring born via cesarean delivery, including obesity, allergy, asthma, type 1 diabetes, and acute lymphoblastic leukemia.”
https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2749054#225229759

Asthma and Allergies

“Cesarean section rather than vaginal deliveries may raise the risk of childhood asthma and allergies by interfering with the child’s immune system development”
https://www.webmd.com/baby/news/20080521/c-section-tied-to-childhood-asthma

“The report found that infants delivered by C-section were at more than double the risk of developing food-borne allergies and asthma by their third birthdays than babies born vaginally.”
https://beta.ctvnews.ca/national/health/2019/4/19/1_4387238.html

Autism and ADHD

“Birth by cesarean section was associated with a 33 percent higher risk of autism and a 17 percent higher risk of attention deficit disorder.”
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/09/23/well/family/autism-c-section.html

Type-1 Diabetes

“Even when accounting for all the known risk factors, it was found that children delivered by C-section were 20% more likely to have type 1 diabetes than those delivered vaginally.”
https://defeatdiabetes.org/c-section-delivery-increases-risk-type-1-diabetes/

Decreased Breastfeeding Success

“Women who had a cesarean delivery showed a lower rate of exclusive breastfeeding and any breastfeeding than those who had a vaginal delivery. In addition, cesarean delivery was related with using formula in the hospital and delayed breastfeeding initiation.”
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29365288/

Risks For Mom

“Women who had C-sections were 80 percent more likely to have complications than those who delivered vaginally” even when controlled for pre-existing health issues or complications.”
https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/cesarean-section-complication-risk-rises-mother-s-age-study-finds-n993611

What If I Need An Emergency C-Section?

In the case an emergency C-section is needed or you choose to go through with a C-section when suggested by a doctor, there are a few ways you can mitigate the potential negative effects. According to research, there seem to be a few key factors that cause the negative health effects to babies born via c-section. A primary factor is babies receiving moms’ microbiome by going through the vaginal canal. An alternative that can be used when a c-section occurs is vaginal seeding.

“Experts have long suspected that bacteria passed from mother to baby during vaginal birth – a process known as “microbiome seeding” – could play a role in protecting children.”
https://beta.ctvnews.ca/national/health/2019/4/19/1_4387238.html

Vaginal seeding, also known as microbirthing, is the practice of using a cotton swab to transfer mom’s vaginal fluids to baby’s mouth, nose, and eyes in an attempt to transfer mom’s vaginal bacterial flora to baby. While there is little research surrounding vaginal seeding since it is a new practice, the only risk of attempting vaginal seeding is if a mother has a vaginal infection or STD. Otherwise, baby is simply being exposed to the fluids they would have been exposed to had they experienced a vaginal birth.

Another key factor is breastfeeding. It is often hypothesized that the lower rate of breastfeeding among c-section mothers plays a role in the negative effects correlated with c-sections such as obesity, allergies, and Type 1 diabetes since breastfeeding has been found to protect against all of these issues as well as other illnesses and disorders.

“There are many health benefits to your child from breastfeeding, including prevention of infections such as ear infections, diarrhea, and other bacterial and viral infections. Research also suggests that breastfeeding may help protect against diabetes and some cancers.”
https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapediatrics/fullarticle/1107563

Whatever choices you make, it’s important to make the decisions knowing the facts and choosing the best direction for your family. I hope this helps empower mothers to make the best choices they can and feel informed when being their own and their baby’s advocate.

5 Quick Steps To Improve Your Parenting This New Year

January 1, 2020Natural Motherhood, Uncategorized8 Comments

1. Make a Detailed List Of The Parent You Want To Be

Include at least 10 characteristics of what an ideal parent is to you. For example, you could say you want to be calm, kind, and affectionate. There is a free handout to help at the bottom of this article! Read more about setting expectations as a parent.

2. Write 3 Things You Want To Change About Your Parenting

Get specific and write out all the details. I would even suggest writing a story down of an example of the parenting characteristics or actions you want to change. This will help you clarify the issues and pinpoint what you want to change and how you may be able to do so.

3. Make An Action Plan

Write a detailed plan for the new behaviors you are going to use to replace your old unwanted behaviors. GET SPECIFIC. For example, instead of telling when my kids aren’t listening I will calmly give them two choices. Write yourself an example to make it real: “You can get your shoes on by yourself or I can help you.”

4. Make a List of 3 Ways You Will Bond With Your Child(ren)

Choose specific activities that you will both enjoy and can do regularly. Also try to choose activities that allow you to chat and focus on each other. For example, if your child is sporty, instead of playing laser tag or something with a lot of distractions, try putt-putt golf so there’s lots of time to chat. Some ideas for bonding with younger children is art activities, going on a walk, or some of these easy activities. Whatever you choose, schedule it in at least twice monthly. Get a calendar or planner, write it down, and stick to it. The consistency of your efforts will mean the world to your child (whether their old enough to express it or not).

5. Reflect and Improve

Although reflection requires a lot of effort, it will by far make the biggest difference in your parenting. Take time at least weekly to check in on your parenting goals and see if you’re meeting them. If not, where can you make little adjustments to make the goals more obtainable. What new examples can you write down to help remember and put into action the way you want to parent? With each reflection, you’ll be able to better embody your parenting goals.

Free parenting goals handout!

You may also find How To Be A Better Parent and The Secret To Being A Calm Mom helpful!

Raising A Minimalist: 6 Quick Tips On Teaching Kids Minimalism

October 7, 2019crunchy mom, Minimalism, mom life, Natural Motherhood5 Comments

We all know consumerism is a huge issue in Western Society. Advertisements and the constant pushes to buy more are everywhere, so it of course effects our children and how they think. From commercials to conversations with friends, acquiring more things is encouraged. For us parents who want our kids to want less and live more, I created a list of tips on teaching our children less is really more.

Limit The Amount of “Stuff” They Can Have

Decide as a family a good number of toys, clothes, and other items such as movies or books that will be a cap for the amount in your home. For example, you can say 5 stuffed animals and 10 other toys then maintain that number by donating anytime you choose to add a toy.

Encourage Experiences

Teach your child to value experiences over stuff. This will mostly be learned through role modeling as well as discussion as they get older. A great way to teach this is to go hiking rather than shopping. Only go shopping when necessary and discuss what you will be getting and why with your child.

*This site contains affiliate links to products. We may receive a commission for purchases made through these links.*

Have A No Presents Rule

Let family and friends know your plans for minimalism! You can tell everyone you’re happy to accept gifted experiences (season passes to a theme park, state park passes, movie gift cards, etc.), but will not be accepting any items.

Read About It

Read books with your child(ren) focused on minimalism and the importance of experiences over stuff.

Here are a few of my favorites:

Regular Donations

Designate a few times of year to donate anything no longer being used such as outgrown clothes, toys, or books. A great time is before yearly school shopping, holidays, and birthdays. Let children know when donation days are approaching so they can prepare.

Role Model

The best way to really raise a minimalist is to be a minimalist!

“It is always the simple that produces the marvelous.” —Amelia Barr

5 Tips For Attachment Parenting

August 15, 2019April 29, 2022crunchy mom, Natural Motherhood8 Comments

How To Succeed at Attachment Parenting

Parenting is hard. Yes, there are ways it can be easier and times it can be easier, and people who say it’s easy (are we really buying that story?), but can we just all agree parenting is hard.

If you are an attachment parent, I am pretty sure you’ve already heard “you’re just making it harder on yourself,” or some other variation of that.

First off, not cool. No one wants to hear criticisms on their parenting ESPECIALLY when you are just trying to do what feels right and what you feel is best for your baby. Yet, I don’t think this will be changing anytime soon.

An argument can be made that attachment parenting makes parenting harder, and basically, everyone (who doesn’t follow as an attachment parenting style) wants to make that argument, but it doesn’t have to. If you go about it with a few things in mind, attachment parenting can actually make parenting easier. Ya, that’s right, EASIER.

If you haven’t heard of it or are just starting to learn your options as a new or expecting mom, attachment parenting is basically an approach to parenting that aims to support your baby’s attachment to you (and possibly other caregivers) as well as meeting baby’s needs promptly (aka responsive caregiving).

This all-natural style instructs parents to be in tune with their child’s needs . . . Attachment parents . . . respond to an infant’s demands immediately and respectfully.
https://parentology.com/what-is-attachment-parenting/

As an attachment parent myself, as well as a parenting coach, I decided to share my tips on making attachment parenting easy!

1. Follow Your Gut

Stick to what feels right. Do not let people push you around or guilt you into thinking you are doing the wrong thing for your little one. As long as you love and are connected to your little ones, your gut will know what’s right for them. Mom instincts are real and you should trust them.

2. Stay Connected But Promote Confidence

It is great and a part of attachment parenting to be responsive and available to your little one. I have found a lot of parents get confused on how to both be attached and responsive but also promote confidence and independence in your child.

The key is to maintain your responsiveness but encourage them to problem solve and engage with the world on their own with you as their safe base. Contrary to common belief, attachment parenting actually promotes independence as children feel safe to explore when they have a secure attachment.

3. Surround Yourself With Like Minded Mamas

Friendships and like-minded individuals are more necessary than ever, especially if you are a stay at home parent. It is important to connect with others who share your view on parenting because attachment parenting is not a mainstream form of parenting, so you may feel criticized or like you are going against the grain often. Having mamas with these similar experiences allows you to share your real experience of motherhood without feeling judged and also connect on a deeper level.

4. Self Care & More Self Care

I have always been bad at self care. I love being productive and doing things for others, so it has never been my strong suit, but becoming a mom has made me realize how important self care is. I now practice self care more than ever because it truly makes me a better mom.

Self care can look any way you want it to, but make sure you are taking time for yourself. As an attachment parent, we put our child’s needs first, but don’t forget your child needs a calm and collected parent as well. Also, practicing self care will be a great life-long example to your child on how to care for themselves.

My self care includes solo coffee shop time or with a close friend, bubble baths, going on a run or hitting the gym. Part of attachment parenting is having a small circle of care for your child.

If you do not have a present partner, try to find a family member or occasional nanny who is supportive of attachment parenting and can step in occasionally so you can get some time for yourself as well. Although we exclusively breastfed, we made solo mom time possible by dad being close by at a park or on a walk so we could still feed on demand when needed.

5. Find Relevant Resources

Find resources for attachment parenting. Stick to resources for parenting that you know will be kind and friendly to your parenting style.

As an attachment parent, you can’t pick up any random parenting book and expect it to work for you, in fact a lot of parenting books make suggestions contrary to current research and attachment style parenting. Ask experienced attachment parents or find groups on Facebook. I also love these resources!

GreenMamaLife Facebook

Natural Parenting Group on Facebook

“Whatever you want to do, if you want to be great at it, you have to love it and be able to make sacrifices for it.”
Maya Angelou

Want more support? Join the slow & natural motherhood course!

6 Reasons Why You Need to Stop Commenting On My Parenting – Natural Parenting

July 30, 2019crunchy mom, Natural Motherhood16 Comments

Why You Are Wrong About My Parenting

I am SO tired of everyone’s comments on my parenting, and apparently, I’m not the only one. Being a part of a few crunchy/natural-style parenting groups on Facebook, I see it every day. The mom crying for help because she is tired of arguing with everyone about her parenting style. I’m not sure why everyone is extra keen on commenting on the mom who is trying attachment or gentle parenting, but it needs to stop. And here is why.

1. You don’t know my kid

First off, I am the mom and know my child best. I spend basically all my time with this human and know all about her. I think you, who has never met my kid or only seen her a few times, have no reason to think you somehow know what is better for her than me.

2. No, I’m not spoiling my kid

If you’ve read any current research on parenting or child development, you would know how important attachment is. I am focusing on my child’s attachment and well-being, and no, I am not spoiling her. Love does not spoil a child, got it?

3. No, my child will not be stuck to me forever

Do you know what doesn’t make needy kids? Kids with their needs met. Meeting my kid’s needs (physically and emotionally) will enable her to feel more able and independent in the world. She doesn’t need to learn to be without me, she needs to learn that she is safe and cared for in the world so she can pursue her own life and not worry about her needs being met.

4. I Need Support

Parenting is hard enough. Even if I was doing something wrong, criticizing me is not the way to help. Present me with your reasoning and maybe we can talk, but in the end, what I really need to be a better mom is support, not your advice.

5. It Feels Wrong

Even if I decided to suddenly follow your parenting advice, I wouldn’t be okay. I parent from the gut and do what I feel is best and natural, so if I follow your advice now I know I wouldn’t feel like myself.

6. I Didn’t Ask.

Need I say more?

“Motherhood: All the love begins and ends there.” ― Nitya Prakash

You may also like: If You Have Something Nice To Say, Say It